While I was working on a recent article on relationships, and dating for people with disabilities for my column in Exceptional Family magazine, I remembered a documentary I had seen about a program in Denmark, where the government has a program to pay for prostitutes for people with disabilities. (And Obama thought he was impressive getting his health bill passed. Let's see him get prostitutes!!) While a family magazine is not an ideal forum to discuss prostitution, I figured the 'Sex, irrespective of disability' campaign would be a great topic for a first blog.
Now, being male, my first reaction was "Damn...I live in the wrong country." However, as I stop to think about it, perhaps this program is not as good as it sounds. Needless to say, the program has created a lot of controversy. One government opposition official commented that it is wrong to be spending tax money on paying prostitutes for sex with people with disabilities, when so much money is spent on trying to get women off of prostitution. Putting aside the issue of getting women off of prostitution, what about the person with the disability? While this may satisfy the physical urge, what about letting the person with a disability experience the emotional connection of a relationship? As a matter of fact, the documentary I had seen commented on the fact that a problem that arises with this program is that the person with the disability develops an attachment to their sex worker, who of course sees him simply as a client.
In defending the program, Stig Langvad of Denmark's Disabled Association said the politicians critical of the plan are showing "double standards". He said: "The disabled must have the same possibilities as other people. Politicians can debate whether prostitution should be allowed in general, instead of preventing only the disabled from having access to it." I can't help but think is having access to prostitutes really the biggest issue people with disabilities face? Would it not be better to educate people and integrate people with disabilities into society more, so that they could interact and date people in a healthy loving relationship, and experience the joy of an emotional connection? That would be the way to ensure that people with disabilities can truly be treated equal in the romance game.
